As I get older, I have more arguments in which I’m forced at some point to step back and realize that neither party is right or wrong – either we’re arguing about different things, or we have legitimately different needs, which leads to conflict. When teaching college composition courses, I tell my students this is the result of a lack of shared assumptions. Going into an argument in with fundamentally incongruent assumptions means that neither party can leave satisfied (though both may very well leave feeling smug).

I think it’s actually quite rare for someone to realize that they are very wrong, and doing so can really shake a person up. So when Dave finally started filling up all the ice cube trays in our freezer instead of just emptying them one by one and waiting for me to take care of it, I thought: here is an act that must be commemorated.